Wife needs space
by Greg
(Media,pa,USA)
My wife of 13 yes just told me she needed space after confronting her about overhearing her talking to her friend about me trying to listen to their conversation,and said " he was lurking around probably to hear us ,but don't worry he won't catch on .
She recently lost her brother and it was extremely traumatic And on top of that she is doing Coke. I found it in her purse twice. She told me I ve been making her unhappy for years ,but only gave me a couple of general complaints about my flaws. Plus she said losing her brother and another relative ,which we all lost , and her complaints about me combined is why she needs space .
She's been going out with her friends sometimes sleeping over the whole weekend . We still live together,we still have sex and she says she has to think about staying with me . I understand this is how she feels right now,and any mention I make about it pisses her off . She also doesn't want me calling or texting her while she is out with her friends.
So not only am I worried about her drinking and doing Coke, and replacing me ,she doesn't do anything to put my mind at ease . I asked her flat out to tell me the truth ,is there someone else and she calmly looked me in the eyes and said no ,no way. She doesn't know how long she will need this space,and im home with our two kids ,they are asking me why mommy isn't home at night.
She's a great mother and a very generous and very compassionate person with everyone now but me . Heart seems to have hardened towards me . I'm devastated I wanna win her back . I have cried to her i can't help it. She has comforted me and said that she feels bad enough. I have until today ,brought up questions to her about this space, but it only seems to push her further away. I want to fight to keep this marriage . I'm respecting her wishes and giving her her space . But it's killing me inside . She has flaws and things about her that I'm not so crazy about,and yet I'm nowhere near needing to decide whether or not we should split. I know everyone is different ,but before all this bs started we were getting along fine ,we went to our neices wedding in November got a room for the weekend and had a great time and great sex. And within a month and a half I feel like I'm a stranger to her help!!!
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You always maintained your impartiality with us. You encouraged Rita to be more assertive in stating what she wanted to get from your counseling sessions, as well as what she wanted to get from the relationship. You taught both of us better communication between ourselves, which lead to an emotional comfort level between us that didn't exist before. You took control of the direction of the session if things were not moving along. Thanks so much for helping us." Rita and Mark |
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