My husband has turned against me
by MA
(India)
My marriage is over.
I doubted it from the moment I stepped foot in my husband’s house, but it became more apparent after the birth of my daughter eight months later.
However, I should say, it’s only me in this situation and not my husband. Because he is still in a marriage. With his mother.
At first, it began with constant interference from my mother-in-law in the clothes I should wear or the places we should visit together. It slowly built up to include how lacking I was and how superior she was in things like cooking or maintaining a friend circle or shopping. I was also constantly compared to my sister-in-law who was just better than me in everything imaginable. I didn’t take any steps against this bullying initially as I wanted to give my marriage my best and I believed that once I endure this initial rough phase successfully, all will be well. But things only started getting worse and it reached a point where I had to involve my husband.
My husband and I had a love marriage and initially, it had been difficult for me to convince my parents for this marriage as my husband has a genetic condition leading to night blindness and limited light vision in both eyes. When I spoke about my feelings and experiences to him regarding his mother and sister, I was shocked by the way he dismissed my emotions and turned the tables on me, saying that it was I who was ill-treating his mother and that he was going to step up and put me in my place if I continued this behavior.
This was also the time when the filthy language started. Since then, I have been called a bitch, an asshole, a maniac, a mentally unstable person who needs to turn to prayers to calm her mind, a manipulator, a person who over-reacts and over-analyzes stuff, and a person who is trying to turn her daughter against her grandparents. He has also told me that if I don’t behave well with his family, then I will be punished and will have to face the consequences. All efforts to sit him down and have a heart-to-heart conversation have ended in turning the situation around and putting the blame on me.
I have lost all hope in saving the marriage and I will not walk out as I don’t think it will be fair to my daughter to do so.
Is there absolutely any advice that you can give me based on my situation?
Gene Kayser uses the Gottman Method Couples Therapy system with it's proven techniques & strategies for couples who want to save their relationship. This is a "nuts and bolts" approach based on 40 years of research & treatment.
For a free 20 minute consultation, Call or Text:
You always maintained your impartiality with us. You encouraged Rita to be more assertive in stating what she wanted to get from your counseling sessions, as well as what she wanted to get from the relationship. You taught both of us better communication between ourselves, which lead to an emotional comfort level between us that didn't exist before. You took control of the direction of the session if things were not moving along. Thanks so much for helping us." Rita and Mark |
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